Roland Emmerich. Does one really need any information other than this to determine that the film you are about to see features horrendous dialogue, over-the-top special effects, and millions upon millions dying? Not me, and The Day After Tomorrow continues his disaster sagas, starting with the now-infamous Independence Day. Jack… Continue reading
We are informed at the beginning of Man On Fire that there is a kidnapping in Latin America every sixty minutes, and 70% of those kidnapped do not survive. These are frightening statistics indeed, but also set the tone for the gritty and grim Man On Fire. Following in the… Continue reading
Commando. That’s what I kept thinking about during The Punisher, the newest arrival off the comic book adaptation factory belt. You know, the 1985 Arnold Schwarzenegger action-fest where he has to rescue little Alissa Milano from the bad guys. The difference is that Commando knew it was bad. The Punisher… Continue reading
I am going to be deliberately vague in my plot synopsis of Spartan, as there are enough twists and turns in this film alone for five movies. Giving it away would be nothing short of a crime. A prominent political figure’s daughter has gone missing. We know it is the… Continue reading
Walking Tall, at the very least, can turn in its claim ticket as the silliest movie of the new year. The ever-popular words “Inspired By A True Story” open the film, and while I can believe the basic story is real, the action is all-out ridiculous. Seeing The Rock walking… Continue reading
At last, a horror remake worth the watch. Like the recent remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Dawn Of The Dead had hefty expectations to live up to. Unlike the recent Chainsaw Massacre, this film fulfills those expectations – for the most part. George A. Romero’s Dawn Of The Dead,… Continue reading
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Exhibit A in the evidence that no more video games, under any conditions, should be made into movies. We have Double Dragon, Super Mario Bros., Mortal Kombat, etc. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, this descent into hell arrives. The… Continue reading
Watching the wheels come off of S.W.A.T. is quite a sight. The film starts off as an above-average action spectacular about the S.W.A.T. teams of Los Angeles. Before long, we are asked to take seriously one of the most bizarre plot “twists” of recent memory. It’s all nosedive from there.… Continue reading
You will spend a lot of time shaking your head during The Order, the newest film from writer/director Brian Helgeland (who co-wrote and won an Oscar for L.A. Confidential). The film introduces a labyrinth of ideas, but rarely capitalizes on any of them. The film is a throwback to religious… Continue reading
It is now official: The James Bond films have been spoofed for all they are worth. Please…NO MORE! Funny how I can make that plea and still give Johnny English a fairly positive review. While it lives up to the very definition of hit and miss, the parts that hit… Continue reading